Monday, February 27, 2012
Mondays of the swearing variety.
I may or may not of/ have (someone please explain that rule to me) muttered words of the four- letter persuasion when the following things did or did not happen. Possibly, maybe, almost certainly.
One of my children came home from school with head lice.
I stepped on the scale last Monday morning and found that all of my sweat, spinach and sit-ups produced a loss of one HALF pound.
I stepped on the scale again this am and found that a diligent repeat of the three S's produced a loss of NOTHING! That makes me want to swear again.
I walked away from my computer for approximately 3 seconds and found that one of my children had "edited" my paper. The paper due that evening and that I had already poured the majority of my working brain cells.
Yesterday morning my daughter stepped on my bare toe with her church shoes. That made me feel nice and spiritual.
Smelling dog poop in the middle of the grocery store and realizing that it came from my son's shoe. The same son's shoe that was wrapped around my waist as I carried him into the store. The same son's shoe that was so nicely tucked between my jacket and my jeans.
Hearing my son dumping domino's all over my laundry room floor. All one hundred and ninety million of them. In case you were wondering they make a very distinctive sound that says "you'll never find all of us, sucker!"
My youngest son got us suspended from the gym for 30 days. That means 30 days without the gym and their 90 (per day) minutes of childcare. I may go insane.
Happy blankety blank Monday!